Blue Like Jazz

I picked up the book Blue Like Jazz on a whim after having seen it on a friend’s Xanga. After having read the first few chapters, I am intrigued. This book is honest and when it comes to all things religious, this sentiment is often overlooked in fear of appearing less than together. The author dives into the book by discussing his own childhood and how it seems oxymoronic for God to refer to Himself as a Father when our world is riddled with so few good examples of what that word means. Interesting question and no, I'm not going to attempt an answer...

His main thought thus far that has captured me is the premise that we are all flawed - something in us is fundamentally broken. I am curious to read more of his transparent journey towards something more than just actions and re-actions. He quotes a poem by CS Lewis that is so honest it makes me uncomfortable, but isn't that Christianity in it's essence? Embracing a Savior who (like He did with Peter) takes our broken lives (especially the ugliest dirty parts) and sitting us uncomfortably down as His perfection wipes the sin stain off.

Sit in the chair, let Jesus roll up His sleeves and wash your feet too. It's painful to reveal our dirt to anyone, let alone the One who was crucified for it, but it's the only way to be clean and it's definitely the only way to be free.

As the Ruin Falls

All this is flashy rhetoric about loving you.
I never had a selfless thought since I was born.
I am mercenary and self-seeking through and through:
I want God, you, all friends, merely to serve my turn.

Peace, re-assurance, pleasure, are the goals I seek,
I cannot crawl one inch outside my proper skin:
I talk of love --a scholar's parrot may talk Greek--
But, self-imprisoned, always end where I begin.

Only that now you have taught me (but how late) my lack.
I see the chasm. And everything you are was making
My heart into a bridge by which I might get back
From exile, and grow man.
And now the bridge is breaking.

For this I bless you as the ruin falls.
The pains You give me are more precious than all other gains.

-CS Lewis